Monday 14 July 2014

Woman with Hulk green breasts, mucky rugby league dolly birds, slapping ...

 


1) COUPLE of interesting revelations from Kevin Locke when he’s quizzed at a lively fans’ forum on BBC Radio Manchester’s Rugby League Extra. First up the personable Salford full-back reveals his best time for the 100m is 10.98, clocked when he was a schoolkid. Rapid. And secondly his pre-match superstition is to shake hands with teammates then slap the seventh one across the face. Probably wise not to try that with Gareth Hock or Rangi Chase, Kevin.


 


2) LOCKE’s pace is going to help make the Red Devils backline seriously quick next season. Mason Caton-Brown showed against Huddersfield he’s got some proper wheels and Ben Jones-Bishop, probably the most elegant athlete in Super League, will be lining up alongside them. Prepare the speed guns, officers. And while we’re on the subject of pace, check out this rah sevens winger Carlin Isles playing for the USA. He’s now at Glasgow Warriors but yet to play a game. Hilariously fast.





 


 


3) THIS blog isn’t all about big lads in tight shorts. Take myself down to the Royal Academy on London’s Piccadilly this week to check out the Summer Exhibition. I’m particularly taken with a tiger’s head that looks like it’s made out of dolly mixtures (£21,000) and a 3D portrait of a woman with Hulk-green breasts (£80,000). Then I spot a catalogue entry ‘Eccles Sunrise’. Have to check it out. I lived in the good parish of Eccles for several years when I was a junior newspaper reporter covering Salford and Swinton. My own Eccles sunrises were either spent in a skip or coming home from a night at the Silver Screen nightclub in the town centre. The Eccles Sunrise at the Royal Academy is a wood engraving by Neil Bousfield costing £240. There’s a bloke with two whippets (promising) but they’re on a beach with sea in the background. Not the Eccles I remember. Sadly, a bit of Googling reveals the engraving is part of a ‘Living in Norfolk’ series and there’s a place called Eccles Beach there. Shame.



 


4) MORE rumblings about Coventry hosting next year’s Magic Weekend. Please God no. Stadium’s decent enough but there’s sod all around it – unless you count a Carphone Warehouse and Clinton Cards as part of your Magic experience. It’s also a taxi ride from the city centre. Looks like Man City’s Etihad Stadium will be out of bounds due to building work. And while it’s refreshing to see Coventry Bears entering the Championship, that’s not enough to merit a weekend at the Ricoh Arena.


 


5) CHECK out DIY, one of Brighton’s many listings magazines. There’s a review of the new Manic Street Preachers album, Futurology, which is described as ‘a real disappointment’. Name of the reviewer is Greg Inglis. Nice to see the Rabbitohs, Queensland and Kangaroos superstar has a bit of spare time when he’s not terrorising opponents.



 


6) MY eagle-eyed accomplice is sprawled on the floor watching the Wakefield v Leeds highlights with me when he clocks a minor detail I’d missed. Referee Matt Thomason sports a tattoo on his right bicep. We rewind and pause to verify and find sadly it’s not one that says ‘I love mum’ or even ‘I love Rhinos’ but more of a vague Celtic design. Now on the lookout to see if Matt is the only whistler with some inkwork.



 


7) SOME great quotes from Ben Jeffries who’ll return to the English game when he joins Leigh in December on a two-year deal. The former Wakefield and Bradford half-back, 34, has been getting bashed about at Kurri Kurri Bulldogs in the Newcastle RL comp (the real NRL as their Twitter feed boasts). Jeffries says: “There’s a few thugs in there who just want to knock your head off and I don’t believe footy should be played like that. You have guys running off the sideline to hit players and people fighting in the stands. You don’t encounter this sort of stuff as a professional. I guess I’ve been shielded for a long time.”


 


8) ATELEA Vea will do well with a bigger profile in Super League. Vea’s a charismatic bloke and his move to Saints from London should give him more exposure. A couple of papers ran news of his switch this week but have to stop calling him a prop. It’s a mistake I first made because he wears the number eight on his back. London coach Joey Grima pointed me in the right direction last time we spoke. “Nah mate, he’s a second rower. Runs out wide.” Smashes people too. Look forward to seeing him in the red vee.


Vea factor: Saints have snapped up the London Broncos second row


 


9) JAMIE Peacock emails this week to say his training camp at London Skolars next month won’t go ahead. Huge shame as it’s one of the first dates to go in my diary. He’s keen to run one next summer down south so on behalf of the Sussex Merlins tourist board – come to Brighton. Two days of skills by the sea and the guarantee of heaps of my son’s rabid, violent, loopy six-year-old pals taking part.


 


10) GREAT pic of Skolars junior Perez Miguel below. Perez was photographed at the club’s minis and juniors awards day. He’s the nephew of coach Joe Mbu so has some first class footsteps to follow.



 


11) MEETING a bloke from Brisbane on Sunday. He’s called Bradford. If I cannot strike up a conversation within 60 seconds with Bradford from Brisbane about the Broncos I will stand in the middle of Headingley and let Jamie Peacock attack me repeatedly with a cricket bat as Gareth Hock applies a flamethrower to my genitals. Watch this space.


 


12) I’VE seen and heard the future – and I like it. Once again State of Origin TV coverage raises the bar with some astonishing behind-the-scenes footage from the third game at Suncorps Stadium. There’s a great chat with Freddie Fittler interviewing New South Wales coach Laurie Daley where he reveals he was made to dress as a girl by his seven sisters. The banter between the pair is warm and so, so relaxed. Then we cut to Daley talking tactics with his Blues side in the dressing room. Difference here is microphones are switched on as Daley talks in front of a whiteboard, mentioning the threat of Cameron Smith and Sam Thaiday. It’s jaw-dropping at first, almost too good to be true. It’s 14 years since Rugby League Raw offered brutally candid, sweary views from the dressing rooms but this is something else. The biggest sporting event in Australia uncovered. Imagine the FA Cup Final with similar access or hearing what Jose Mourinho has to say as he bleats to his Chelsea millionaires. I know in the past the BBC have pushed for audio to compliment their camera shots pre-match and at half-time and come up against a brick wall. With Sky’s track record for innovation and technical excellence in the game they must be licking their lips. Time to push on again. Rugby league can lead the way.





 


13) HOW much time have you got to waste today? An hour? More? Time to brew up, break out the Penguins multi-pack and check out all the wonderful covers from 400 issues of Rugby League World and Open Rugby. From the very first black and white effort through Des Drummond posters to some mucky-looking RL dolly birds (a ‘where are they now?’ feature surely – though they’re probably in Rochdale). There are some real gems to be found. Congratulations to the mag and all who sail in her and go here to waste away your day.


 






 




 


 


Article source: http://clareherald.com/2014/07/10/worlds-largest-tag-rugby-festival-gets-underway-2361/


Woman with Hulk green breasts, mucky rugby league dolly birds, slapping ...

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