The England women"s rugby team are tougher than you"ll ever be

When I was invited to take part in one of England’s notorious ‘toughen-up

Tuesday’ training sessions – which captain Katy Mclean calls a “total

beasting” – earlier in the summer, I confess I took to proceedings a certain

air of superiority. “I’m bigger, stronger and faster,” I thought

to myself, playing a highlights reel from my university team heyday in my

mind. “They’re not even professional sportsmen.”

It didn’t take the England team long to knock such idiotic thoughts out of my

head.

The England women’s rugby team is professional in everything but name (and, of

course, pay packet, although there are whispers that the sevens team will be

rewarded with contracts after the World Cup). For instance, in the past year

the squad have spent 112 days on international duty. They juggle their jobs

– the squad includes policewomen, teachers, and a vet – with these strenuous

commitments to England. Each player effectively spends all her spare time

either training or playing rugby.

Indeed, they are backed by a team of 12, including a doctor, three physios and

three coaches, one of whom is Stuart Pickering, formerly the strength and

conditioning coach at Worcester Warriors. Pickering would became my worst

enemy that afternoon.

The training camp started with Pickering ordering the squad to strap on heart

rate monitors, which would be constantly studied by the team of physios on

the sideline. We were told to take on electrolytes as a mounted video camera

was readied to scan the action. I felt a lump in my throat. This was not

going to make pretty viewing.

^{Head camera shows what training with England is like}

We began the session with some touch rugby, which was mellow enough, and my

only key involvement was a rather clumsy dummy run which led to a try for my

side.

Next up was sprints. I was ushered out towards where the wingers and fullbacks

were standing. “He’s a boy, so he’ll be quick,” I heard someone

say. Buoyed by the comment, I kept pace with the speedsters for about the

first four try line-to-22 bursts, though tailed off for the final six. I was

tactically preserving my energy – or so I told myself.

Pickering barked: “Malcolms next.”

I queried what this involved. Mclean winked at me and said: “Just make

sure you keep your head up and your hands on your hips; if you show signs of

tiredness we will all have to do it again … so don’t.”

The next 10 minutes were horrific. It transpires Malcolms are a rugby league

drill invented by the evidently sadistic Malcolm Reilly, the former Great

Britain coach.

You start lying on the ground face down with chin on the halfway line, push up

and run backwards to the 10-metre line, go down completely flat on the

ground again before pushing up once more and sprinting to the far 10-metre

line. Even describing it is an effort.

We had to perform this six times and by the fourth I was blowing hard. During

the final repetition I was last by some distance, my legs were burning, and

I was already expelling deeply unattractive noises of effort which would

come to punctuate my afternoon with increasingly regularity.

On their fronts, their heads turned to watch me complete the set, the women

cheered – rather than jeered – words of encouragement. “Suck

it up Ollie, imagine it’s the last five minutes of the World Cup final,”

shouted fullback Danielle ‘Nolli’ Waterman, daughter of Bath legend Jim

Waterman, with a grin. I welcomed their collective mothering, and needed it

for what was to come shortly.

While the squad and I completed our Malcolms, on the adjacent pitch the

coaches had mapped out the ultimate rugby training circuit. It was killer,

as though Martin Johnson had been granted carte blanche in designing

the obstacles on a special edition of Gladiators.

^{Group huddle: Oliver and the squad during their session (PIC: GPPICS)}

Having just about caught my breath, I buddied up with 28-year-old Mclean. At

5’6″ tall and weighing 11st the South Shields primary schoolteacher is

one of the more diminutive of the group, and certainly possesses more modest

dimensions compared to me.

Side by side we performed farmers’ lifts, raising weights before running half

the pitch and back, twice. Then, with a 30-second breather, we were heaving

weights on the end of ropes between our legs. By now my grunts were

incredibly loud, and embarrassing next to the silent, efficient Mclean.

On and on we moved, from one challenge to the next, and as my energy levels

dipped uncomfortably low it became a delirious blur. There was the plough,

which required a low body dip and straight drive (rather than into the

ground, as I could only manage in my shattered state), downing stand-up

tackle bags, hitting and rolling other bags. And then, once all that was

over, it was time for the coup de grâce.

We were tasked with wrestling the rugby ball off each other. I started with

it, gripping as hard as I could – but Mclean stole it from me within five

seconds. Completely zapped of stamina and spirit, I attempted to wrest the

ball back, and simply couldn’t – not to save my life. And I think the

skipper was even giving me a chance.

Emasculated and humiliated, I feigned willing to take part in the 40-minute

game that followed the circuit training, slipping a bib over my head. As the

women, who showed no sign of tiredness, took to the field one of the

coaches, Graham Smith, tugged me back and said: “I don’t think you

should do this mate … you might actually get hurt.”

He wasn’t wrong. Mightily relieved that I had an excuse to stop the

punishment, I silently took my place on the touchline and watched on,

humbled.

So as you watch Mclean and her amazingly focused England team-mates charge

into their World Cup battle, dispel any thoughts that you, dear boy, could

match them. Instead, give them the respect and support that they deserve.

^{Unfinished business: England narrowly lost to New Zealand in 2010}

Sky Sports World Cup schedule

August 1

Australia v South Africa, KO 2.45pm, Marcoussis, Sky Sports 3

England v Samoa, KO 5pm, Marcoussis, Sky Sports 3

France v Wales, KO 7.45pm, Marcoussis, Sky Sports 3

August 5

England v Spain, KO 2.45pm, Marcoussis, Sky Sports 1

New Zealand v Ireland, KO 5pm, Marcoussis, Sky Sports 1

France v South Africa, KO 7.45pm, Marcoussis, Sky Sports 1

August 9

England v Canada, KO 2.45pm, Marcoussis, Sky Sports 1

New Zealand v USA, KO 5pm, Marcoussis, Sky Sports 1

Australia v France, KO 7.45pm, Marcoussis, Sky Sports 1

August 13

Semi-final 1, KO 5pm, Stade Jean-Bouin, Sky Sports 4

Semi-final 2, KO 7.45pm, Stade Jean-Bouin, Sky Sports 4

August 17

WRWC final, KO 5.45pm, Stade Jean-Bouin, Sky Sports 4

Article source: http://www1.skysports.com/rugby-union/news/12507/9147218/wales-scarlets-coach-simon-easterby-hails-jonathan-davies-comeback

The England women"s rugby team are tougher than you"ll ever be